an unlearning lesson

Extract my thoughts

extract your hands

you got what you came for

an over giving girl

so desperate to prove herself

knees scabbed over
in self abandonment

am I pleasing you enough

while I’m over extended

don’t even appreciate me

only when I’m bleeding

how do you measure up to me

I’m so fucking good

you compliment me with glee

a confirmation
of something you can take from

god she’s so good
at being taken

the walls fade

and I come undone

so tired
in need of someone

won’t say that shit aloud

handle it all so well
with a smile

can’t sleep through the night
somehow

my own body revolts me

need the rest
but she won’t hear me

my alarm rings

my back screams

I want to cry

I show up bright

serve the whole room

brighten lives
from an empty bulb

do it beautifully

that’s why they envy me

the amount of resilience
that pours out

everyone wants to pour
from this cup

not sure I’ve been repaid enough

my heart is full
but my bones are numb

it’s all only temporary

even his presence

and if I had the balls
I’d end this

but then they couldn’t benefit

I hope you know
I blame you for this

never landing somewhere safe

a line of takers who

take

take

take

your body swims inside my lake

a coral reef
of unforgiving

when I’m tired
I’m someone different

when I’m taken
I’m the villain

when you’re breathing
I’m forsaken

I’m a dragon
fire breathing

I deplore you
for even speaking

it’s all over now
my anger seething

alarm will ring tomorrow

and I’ll go back to

daydreaming

---

Petals & Teeth